August 27, 2005

• Know When to Fold ‘Em

  
  

  Well after 5 weeks of relaxing, I’m back in the saddle again about to start a role on “Without A Trace” next week.  It’s a well written character playing the fiance of the episode’s missing girl and I have a good scene with Anthony LaPaglia.

  
  

  I’ve had the luxury of being able to “pass” on a few projects in between “The Gene Generation” up until now — but only because I’ve been working fairly consistently lately and don’t desperately need the dough; otherwise it might be a different story.  

  
  

  One role was a gangster for a TV show.  A part of me just didn’t want to portray yet another Evil Asian ”Outsider” but the other part of me just knew that I was not the “gangsta type”. 

  
  

  I’d simply look asinine trying to pull off lines like, “This ain’t fair, yo!” (an actual line, btw).  I know, I know, there’s something to be said for “stretching out” but not for something like this.  It was a straight up, conventional, obligatory “Chinatown Gang” episode.

  
  

  Another was for a role on a new sitcom for the UPN.  I knew where the jokes were intended to be, but the lines just weren’t funny… at all.

  
  

  I kept trying to work on the lines but to no avail.  I figured if I can’t laugh at these lines, how am I supposed to make someone else laugh at them?

  
  

  But this screening process all started a few years ago when a director wanted to meet me for the musical, “Pacific Overtures” that he was putting up on Broadway. 

  
  

  I kept telling my agent, “I can sing and hold a tune, but I’m not a singer.”  But my agent insisted that since they specifically requested for me (the director must’ve been a “BLT” fan), it would be prudent to accept the appointment.   I was even informed by the casting director that I could just sing “Happy Birthday” if I wanted to.  “Okey-dokey, that’s what I’ll do,” I thought.

  
  

  So I went to the audition.  Signed in and sat down.  Then lo and behold, I hear these powerful singing voices just BLASTING through the walls.  I’m talking about being able to actually feel the vibrations from their voices hitting me square in the chest –  through the wall!  I felt totally out of my element, probably like a reality star at an acting audition.  

  
  

  When it was my turn to audition, I entered the room and faced a panel of 5 people behind a table and a piano, ala “American Idol” style.  The piano player asked, “Do you have your sheet music?” 

  
  

  “Huh?”, I thought.  “Um, I’m singing Happy Birthday, ” I replied.  I was then instructed to sing and the piano player would follow in my key.

  
  

  Halfway through the song, I realized, “Who should I sing Happy Birthday to when ‘Happy Birthday, dear… (fill in name here)’… comes along?”  So after directing the birthday wish to the casting director, I was asked to sing it again in the key of  ”G”.

  
  

  “Huh?” 

  
  

  Total disaster.  Any respect for my performance in “BLT“ from this director was now long gone.

  
  

  So in short, what I garnered from that experience was:  If the material doesn’t speak to/or connect with you — don’t go in.  It’s better to not been seen at all than to be seen badly.  You don’t have to go in for everything… advice I should’ve heeded a few months ago before auditioning for FOX’s “Kitchen Confidential” and looking like an idiot in front of Darren Star (“90210“, “Melrose Place” and “Sex and the City“) — but that’s a story for another day.   

  • 1:52 pm
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